By Mairo-the-Poet:
Lord, on your Second Coming
Please do not return on a Monday
Monday morning blues will be hanging around me like thick clouds.
So I won’t be a good and amenable guest!
Please on your Second return Lord
Please do not come back on a Tuesday
That is the busiest day of my week
I plan meetings and work late into the night!
Please Lord, do not return on a Wednesday
For that is the day I actually attend the meetings and events.
Lord, you already know me as one of your most hardworking servants
So please do not return on a Thursday
After tying up all loose ends at work,
That is the day I attend Worship Practice, Youth Bible Study and plan Sunday School lessons.
Please Lord, do not return on a Friday
I won’t be ready
For Friday is my lazy day
For I just go through the motions at work
Half of the day, and do some family shopping in the afternoon.
Please Lord, I implore you,
Do not come back on a Saturday
For that is my movie day
I haven’t missed a box office hit
for the past thirty-eight years
And my friends always come round
And then we party all the night.
Please Lord, I am not so sure if you should return on a Sunday either
Look Lord, let’s negotiate :
Sunday morning, I wake up so early
And like Mary and the girls, I clean up the Church
Set up up the decor and set up the equipment
Then I must welcome every congregant
Lead Praise and Worship
Preach the sermon for the day
Pray for everyone
Collect the tithe and lock up the Church doors
(It might look like it’s easy, Lord, but if people don’t see their Pastor perform some miracle,
They will take their tithe to someone else.
I mean, you know the story, Lord.)
Let’s come back to our issue again,Lord.
Look Lord, church is in the morning
My favorite soccer team plays in the afternoon
I may go to the stadium or watch from home.
So, is it possible, Lord, that you delay your return just for a little while :
When a local Pastor is visiting
We rehearse for a full week
For an international one we take a month
When the Bishop is coming to town
We take a full year and a half
So, for you Lord, that might take a long while
So I will talk to my Secretary to clear up my schedule and lighten it a little bit
Then we can discuss this issue and come up with a tentative date.
However, Lord, if some crisis happens
And the government decides to close our church doors
Please, Lord, return immediately!